Sexuality is an important part of the human experience. God made us loving creatures, and one way we express love is through this intimate connection that requires vulnerability. Sexual intimacy is a sensitive topic for many. Everyone is unique, but there are certain commonalities for each of the Energy Types. Understanding what drives your sexual experience will help you find a healthy relationship and work through difficulties you might be having with your partner.
What is an Energy Type?
First, let’s talk about some defining differences in our energies. There are four Energy Types that help clarify our most basic natures.
Type 1 people are the bubbly and optimistic ones in this world. They might seem a little scattered or have their head in the clouds. Their unpredictable and sporadic approach to life can be misconstrued as a lack of commitment. A Type 1 person is always going to be full of ideas and struggle to stick with one path for very long.
Type 2 beings are adaptable and emotional. They tend to be the most empathetic of the Energy Types and will expect their partner to have the same approach towards their emotional needs or feelings. The Type 2 person adjusts to the situation, so they may seem wishy-washy to other Types.
Type 3 lovers are fiery and passionate. They are either hot or cold, with almost no neutral feelings in them. Many Type 3s are fiercely loyal and extremely driven. They tend to push those around them, which can feel overbearing, abrasive or aggressive to other Types. They tend to miss the emotional signals of other Types because they are more focused on goals and results.
Type 4 individuals are the steady and bold ones. They tend to be the most grounded of the four types and are extremely predictable and intellectual. With a consistent approach to life that loves coloring in the lines and following the rules, Type 4s often get blamed for being boring. They can also come across as overly thorough and very straightforward because they are so linear in their thinking.
Types 1 and 3 have an energy that flows out, making them active and outgoing.
Types 2 and 4 have an energy that flows inward, making them introspective and attentive.
If you don’t know your Energy Type, take my FREE Energy Type quiz now! Understanding where you land in this breakdown will really help you be true to your innermost self.
Sexual Intimacy True to Your Type
Knowing the Energy Type of yourself and those around you can help you manage your expectations. You can find common ground when you know your most basic tendencies and the basic tendencies of your partner, pinpointing the disconnect.
Sexual Intimacy for Type 1: LIGHT
The Type 1 lover needs a light approach to sexual intimacy. When things get heavy, the Type 1 feels trapped and dragged down.
This can be achieved with some flirting that is well received by the other party. It might include playful attire and time spent making yourself look attractive.
It’s important to understand that your partner might not feel this same need, so your lighthearted approach to intimacy is really for yourself. And that’s totally okay!
Smells and scents can help lighten up the mood as well. My I am Balanced oil contains sweet floral, exotic notes that will brighten up your aura. A couple of oil drops behind your ears or on your wrists can lighten up your countenance and make you feel ready to open up to your partner.
Sexual Intimacy for Type 2: CONNECTION
If you are a Type 2, you crave connection. However, if you are not connected with your own body, you will yearn for someone else to bridge that gap. It’s unfair to expect your partner to make this happen, and they will probably fail, leaving you feeling lonely or unloved. So, start by alleviating that expectation and realizing that the connection you are missing is mostly within yourself.
Music is a really good way to help you connect with yourself. Choose a soundtrack or playlist that makes you feel turned on and in the mood to open up to your partner. Feel the comfort and excitement that music can bring out in you.
Introspective practices, like yoga, can be extremely helpful in establishing this mind-body connection for the Type 2 as well. A slow-flow practice is perfect for the natural cadence of the Type 2 Energy.
Sexual Intimacy for Type 3: ACTIVITY
It’s hard for Type 3s to be patient. If you are a Type 3, you want faster results and tend to enjoy a physical romp much more than an emotional encounter. While you can’t expect other Energy Types to want this approach all the time, it may be important to you to have some quicker experiences in the bedroom.
It’s also important that you exert some of your energy doing something extremely active outside of the bedroom. If your partner is another Energy Type that doesn’t enjoy a fast-paced life, you may need to find an activity to do on your own that fills this drive. You can try HIIT (high-intensity interval training), boxing and CrossFit for fast-paced workouts centered on results. You may also feel thrilled by traveling to new places or trying adventurous activities (like white water rafting, skydiving or horseback riding).
Sexual Intimacy for Type 4: PRESENCE
It takes time for a Type 4 to warm up to their partner and feel connected to them in an intimate way. For a Type 4, this doesn’t necessarily mean a conversation, but it does require time spent together. Type 4s are often private and walled off until they feel safe to open up to their partner.
Try spending just 10 minutes a day together after the hustle and bustle of the day slows down. Find ways to spend time with your partner in the same room without a huge focus on a specific activity. Chat openly during this time without a goal for the conversation.
The Type 4 individual also needs to spend time on themselves, checking in with their own body and practicing presence in their life. Practicing meditation is good for all Types, but it is especially helpful for the Type 4 in finding that presence of mind.
Combining Your Types for a Functional Relationship
Relationships take work. A long-term relationship isn’t usually spontaneous and natural—it takes planning and effort. Planning out ways to connect does not make that connection any less genuine.
You may have to take turns doing the things that are important to you. If only one partner is getting their way, then you may not be communicating your needs (or you might be in a toxic relationship).
You may be able to find things that draw both of you into the same intimate space. For example, the light smells for a Type 1 could easily combine with the music that helps the Type 2 feel connected.
Healing Your Sexual Intimacy in Just 3 Weeks
There will be times when you need to cater to the deep desires of your partner (and then vice-versa). However, it’s very important that each of you also work on fulfilling your own inner needs and not expecting your partner to do all the work.
Everyone has sexual shame and conflict in their relationships. Everyone.
I offer a powerful course on healing your sexual intimacy over a period of three weeks. Join my plan now to learn about making a deeper connection through sex!