Do you sometimes feel you’re not as beautiful as other women?
In part 1 of this series, I shared how to stop the old habit of “finding flaws in yourself.”
The second most common way we keep ourselves stuck in shame-based beauty is by experiencing beauty as a competition with other women, rather than as a camaraderie of women.
#2—Comparing yourself to other women.
We all learned to do this in our early teens.
When we were 12 or 13 years old, we were insecure and uncertain about our appearance. Our culture teaches us that beauty looks a certain way, and those who express it in that way are more popular. As a young and innocent girl if you didn’t fit that pattern, you may have concluded that you were not attractive.
To address this wounding, let’s do this exercise together.
Find a picture of your 13-year-old self. The one I used is featured in my book, Discover Your Type of Beauty. You might remember it because it’s the one where I completely inked my face out. I believed I was so ugly!
Once you’ve found your picture, write a letter to that 13-year-old girl and tell her the truth about who she is.
Here’s a template to get you started:
Dear Beautiful 13-year-old self,
I love and appreciate you. I want to tell you the truth of who you are. The truth is………………………………………………………
The old beliefs of……………………………………….., are not true.
You are a beautiful Type….. girl, and what that means is……………………………..
I want you to join me in knowing and living the truth of who we are.
You are special.
Love,
Your amazing adult self
Next week we’ll look at the ways we judge our bodies to still not be good enough and why that’s keeping us in a shame-based beauty experience. I’ll share what we can do to shift it to a truth-based beauty experience.
Remember, take a moment and write that letter to your beautiful 13 year old self.
